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Had our prenup photos at La Vista today (super delayed). Jo and I had originally wanted non-sweetie poses but got art-directed by Pilar into a whole slew of them. I can’t imagine how they will come out as Jo and I kept sniggering while holding the poses. We will be getting the CD tomorrow and I will post a pic or two if I can tiyan it.
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Prior to the prenup shoot I spent a few hours at Emphasis to get a Lulur Scrub and Massage, a hair treatment, and some waxing. I’ve been so tired this week I kept falling asleep in between sessions. But it was great to be pampered, I could get really spoiled this way. I’m going back tomorrow for a manicure / pedicure and a facial. Sarap to the bonez!

You’ve got to try out Susie of Emphasis for waxing. She’s DA BOMB!!!
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My prenups makeup was another story. I’m a bit of a cosmetic snob and was appalled to see that my foundation was cakey and didn’t match my skin color, plus my eye makeup was blah, and my lipstick was orange (so not my color). Blast my bad eyesight because I should have caught how fucked up my makeup was while it was being done. I had to pass by work to pick up my own makeup and redo my face in the car on the way to La Vista. Grrr.

Aba, I should have gotten a free makeup done nalang at one of the cosmetic counters at Rustans. Libre pa.
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It’s Jo’s bachelor party tonight. And I am STILL at the office reviewing work. Hay.

I must say Jo has been patient with me as I’ve been in a bit of a snit for most of the day. Little things are annoying me - like my button down shirt not being starched properly, a driver driving between 2 lanes, a slow turner. Ayayay. Jo just pats me on the head (I know he is controlling himself and trying to be patient) so I got a bit guilty about being an ass and kept my thoughts (and my upturned middle finger) to myself.
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Still another hectic day. Lunch with my side of the family. A meeting with Threelogy. Dinner with Joel’s side of the family. Short chicka with Roy (Jo’s best friend) and his fiancee Mayette.

And here I am reviewing budgets and schedules for a submission tomorrow. Hahay. Last na talaga sana ito. I am advising our client that I am going on leave for the next 10 days.
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I’m also getting a bit antsy about Joel’s interview tomorrow. I know all his papers are fixed, but then the US Consuls are such loose cannons. Fingers crossed talaga ako.
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We’ve reset the prenup shoot to Wednesday, as our church seminar has been reset naman to Tuesday. Ok lang, as I still don’t have anything to wear. Pilar says jeans and a natural-colored shirt….natural being “nature-al”? I’m not upset though….another reason to go shopping!
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I had the final fitting of my dress din last Saturday. Ok na lahat thanks to the wonders of Bettys corset and padding. I actually had cleavage! My veils a bit too long though, so I will have it cut so it only extends a bit from the back of my dress.
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Yi. Im getting sleepy na. I’ve got to label a furniture layout pa and mark items that will be moved from the client’s existing office. Geez. My eyebags are gonna be baaaad tomorrow.

Joel’s back! and it is like we were never apart. I met him at the airport last night, drove home with him and his dad. Checked out the champagne he bought for our toast (Dom Perignon, ba ang sosy ni Jo….sapatos ko na sana yon hehe). Had Inihaw na Liempo at Countryside. Got dropped home by Jo and Ka Vic (who drives for them)…bah! no “alone time”

But we made up for that today. Jo picked me up at the office and we spent the day together. Fitted our rings (mali ang design argh! got to get them again next Wednesday). Had the arrhae made. Got a massage (Joel) and footscrub (Mia). Ate at Cafe Juanita. Chittered a lot.

Jo got me a present. A camisole. Black. Silky. Ehehe.

Big change from my puruntong short and ratty shirt sleeping attire.

With 11 days to go until marriage I can’t help but feel a weird grumble in my gut. No, its not hunger this time….I think its a mix of anticipation and fear. What am I getting myself into?

Joel’s arriving tomorrow and then it will be a whirlwind of preps and catching up.

This may be my last “silent time” until the night before the wedding. I really do intend to get an hour or two to myself the night before…because I want to write letters to my family and to Jo.

I am listening to Nicole Kidman and Ewan Mcgregor singing “Come What May” on my beloved “puter”, who I have spent the most time with in the last 5 years or so? Loser ba? Hehe. I am not the friendly sort really, and prefer to keep to myself. I don’t like adjusting to people, and sometimes it is such and effort to even smile and be civil to most people.

I never really thought I would get married. Jo and I had a really comfy relationship a few years ago, in Manila. I thought we would grow old still going out with each other. And I even had my idea of the perfect relationship. Neighbors. In an apartment complex. We would spend time together, have dinner, watch TV or go out, then go back to our respective apartments (ok, occasionally we could sleep in each others places : P )

But I left for Shanghai to work, and he went to the US as well. And we never got to spend much time together after that. There was the occasional trip to Manila for Joel (once every 2 years!) and I couldn’t even visit him because I couldn’t get a US Visa (fucking embassy…all I asked for was a week, which was all the time I could get off work. na deny pa ako BAH!)

At the beginning it was really hard. I kept weeping. But after a while I guess you get used to it.

We kept in touch through chatting and the weekly phone call. It used to be twice weekly but I almost had a conniption when I got my PHP 10,000.00+ phone bill. I used to worry that he would meet someone else and would dread getting a phone call saying “Ummm, I met someone…….” Ack! We’ve had our fights pa rin, and it is really so much harder to deal with that when you’re so far apart. No pat on the shoulder to show you’re trying to be malambing, no hugs, just cold voices on the phone and silence until someone gives in or makes the first move.

I have fears. Fear I won’t be able to adjust even if I try. Fear Jo might find me too headstrong. Fear that I am too set in my ways to make the change. Fear that I really am the selfish arrogant bitch people sometimes say I am. I want to be a really good wife and will try damn hard, pero what if I am not.

I want to be with Jo. I want to be with Jo. I want to be with Jo. Because really, it is only with Jo that I feel I belong. We used to say na when we weren’t together we felt like “half”

Haay. Why am I rambling. I’m going through a rollercoaster of emotions.

Thoughts from the idle mind of a “half” (soon to be not “half” na!!!)

Marriage. Leap of Faith talaga.

The song playing now is “Return to Me” by October Project. That must be a sign.